Thankfulness Project Monday

"If you concentrate on finding whatever is good in every situation, you will discover that your life will suddenly be filled with gratitude, a feeling that nurtures the soul."

-Rabbi Harold Kushner

Awesome quote, isn't it? We so often focus on the negative in every situation that we can easily miss the good in the situations. I try to be intentional about trying to acknowledge the good, but sometimes it can be tough! That being said, here are a few of the good things I've noticed in different situations recently. I'm feeling thankful for:

• Good Quotes: I just finished quote week here on the blog, and I think I fell in love with quotes just a little bit more. They're Just. So. Good. 
• Thought provoking books: I love a good book, and enjoy reading "for fun" books. However, books that make me think, provide information, or give me new ideas for my job are always winners in my book. I'm thankful for books!
• Clementines: I've been enjoying clementines for the last few months, but I don't think I've ever put it on a thankful list. This is unfortunate because I really love them and get excited when winter hits and they are back in season. Yummmmmm.
• Fresh Air: I live in an area where I don't breathe in constant pollution and smog, and it's never really something I stop to think about when I walk outside. However, I'm very thankful that I can walk outside and breathe in relatively clean air. 
• My Little Lifesaver: Allergens have been much worse this winter then in previous winters (probably because we haven't gotten much in the way of a good freeze), and I've been battling with a lot of sinus migraines because of this. My little lifesaver has helped decrease the strength of my headaches, and has allowed me to keep functioning throughout the day. I love this thing! 

And those are a few of the things that I'm feeling thankful for right now. 

Now it's your turn!

What are you feeling thankful for today? How do you handle allergies (if you have them!)? What's one of your favorite books? 

Great & Noble Tasks

It's the end of Quote Week:( I enjoy passing along quotes, and hope that something from this week has stuck out to you, and you've found a quote that is helpful to you. Here's the last quote for this week:

"I long to accomplish a great and noble task, but it is my chief duty to accomplish small tasks as if they were great and noble."

-Helen Keller 

Helen Keller has a number of fantastic quotes that I enjoy. This one in particular stood out to me, because I know that most people at some point in life (including myself) has felt frustrated that I'm not doing anything that I feel is big or noble. I feel like I'm doing very normal, small tasks that won't make a difference in the grand scheme of things. We cook meals, do laundry, mow the lawn, check off to do lists at work, or drive our kids around. We accomplish many little tasks that we don't enjoy doing, or feel that the tasks we do waste our time. It's easy to feel beaten down and frustrated when we feel trapped in the small tasks.

I like how Helen Keller looks at those little tasks. I'm wondering how our lives would e different if we viewed the little things we had to do in life as if they were great and noble? How would we start to do engage in those tasks? Would we feel more joyful and content in life? It's an interesting thought...

Courage & Willingness

It's Quote Week here on my blog, so make sure to check out earlier posts this week if you've missed any of them. Here's the quote for today:

"Courage to start and willingness to keep everlasting at it are the requisites for success."

-Alonzo Newton Benn

Success. We strive for it, and we can easily become a slave to it. Success isn't bad, but when we allow it to become our master, it can get unhealthy. However, I know it's also easy to feel like we aren't successful at the things that we want to be successful at. Sometimes, when it comes to success we forget that it involves a "willingness to keep everlasting at it". We try for a week, a few months, maybe a year, but it's really hard to keep at it if we don't see the results that we were hoping for. Sometimes, to be successful, we not only need the courage to start (it's scary to try something new!), but we don't the willingness to keep going at it, even when it seems impossible.

Do you have the courage & willingness needed to be successful at those things in which you want to be successful?

Striving For Excellence, Not Perfection

It's Quote Week here on the blog, and I hope you've been enjoying reading some of my favorite quotes.

"Striving for excellence motivates you; striving for perfection is demoralizing."

-Harriet Braiker

About a year ago I did a series on perfectionism. Perfectionism robs us of that which is excellent. Striving for perfectionism can drive us mad because we cannot be perfect. We are not perfect people. We can be people of great excellence, but we won't be perfect. Are you able to let go of the striving for perfection in order to grab hold of that which is great and excellent?

For more information on perfectionism, check out the following posts:

• Hello, I'm ____ & I'm a Perfectionist 
• Black & White Thoughts of a Perfectionist
• Perfectionism & The Distortion of Identity 
• The Development of Perfectionism {Part 1}
• The Development of Perfectionism {Part 2}
• Thoughts of a Perfectionist 

The Time To Relax...

It's Quote Week on the blog, meaning I'm sharing some of my favorite quotes with my readers. Here's the quote for the day:

"The time to relax is when you don't have time for it. "

- Sydney J. Harris

This quote, which is short and sweet, hits the nail on the head. When we get overloaded, stressed, and having a list a mile long of things to do, one of the first things we give up is self care activities. What we need most is to take a few moments to relax, reground, and take care of ourselves, but it's one of the last things we want to do. This is a difficult thing for many of my clients to see, and if they can't force themselves to break that cycle and relax when they don't have time for it, they often hit a period of burnout or breakdown. Taking time for ourselves, especially when we don't have time for it, is incredibly important. 

The Spirit In Which We Face Circumstances.

It's no surprise that I'm a fan of quotes, and often start out posts with a quote that I've found. Sometimes I like to take a break from regular posting and do some posts about my favorite quotes. Guess what? This week is the week! Each day I will be choosing a favorite quote and sharing a few thoughts about it.

"I find that it is not the circumstances in which we are placed, but the spirit in which we face them, that constitutes our comfort." 

-Elizabeth T. King

This quote has recently been a bit convicting for me. It's tough when we find ourselves in tough situations, or situations where we feel like we cannot survive. It's hard to know what to do, and all we want is to be "ok". I think the phrase "the spirit in which we face them" is interesting, and it is that which convicts me. We don't always get to choose our circumstances at all, but we do get to choose how we face the circumstances in which we find ourselves. When you find yourselves amidst an unpleasant situation, do you stop and think about the spirit in which you choose to face them? Do you stop to think about healthy ways to respond, or do you react poorly? It's tough to recognize that we have the power to choose how we face different circumstances, and it's even more difficult to own the power that we do have.

Thankfulness Project Monday

"But the value of gratitude does not consist solely in getting you more blessings in the future. Without gratitude you cannot long keep from dissatisfied thought regarding things as they are."

-Wallace Wattles

Happy Monday! I love including various quotes on gratitude and thankfulness at the beginning of these posts. I think they stop and make you think for a moment on your perceptions and attitudes. Alright. Onto some of the things that I'm feeling thankful for today. 

• The personal stories my readers choose to share. Especially with this latest series on breakups, many of you have left comments sharing parts of some of your stories. THANK YOU for that. I appreciate your input and willingness to engage with me and others here. 
• Daylight lasting later. I know that we lost an hour of sleep, but the fact that it is now light past 8 o'clock is well worth it in my mind. I love it!
• Inspiring quotes. Quotes have a way of encouraging, motivating, and causing us to think. They are something we can help ground ourselves in, or pull out in a situation where we need encouragement. 
• The Office. I was really skeptical when Michael left last season, but I've still found myself enjoying current episodes and laughing throughout. What do you think?
• Blankets. I'm cheap, and really dislike spending much money on heat. I'm thankful for blankets because they keep my nice and warm when it's cold in my house. Plus I feel more relaxed when I'm all snuggled up. 

There you go. A few little things I'm thankful for today. 

Now it's your turn!

Do you still enjoy watching the Office, or did you stop watching when Michael left? Do you like Daylight Saving Time? What are you feeling thankful for today? 

Friday Favorites

Favorite Tiny Delight of the Week

The weather hitting 70 degrees this week! How's that for a little delight? (i'd actually call it a pretty big delight) I whipped out some dresses and sandals and enjoyed not wearing a coat to work in the mornings (or having to scrape my windows)! 

Favorite Quote of the Week

"I find that it is not the circumstances in which we are placed, but the spirit in which we face them, that constitutes our comfort." -Elizabeth T. King

Favorite Post By Someone Else

Raw Protein Energy Snack- I haven't personally tried making these yet, so I can't vouch for their taste. However, they LOOK delicious and they sound healthy too. The perfect mix. Check it out.

Favorite Past Post

I am only one, but I am still one.- This was posted March 9, 2011, and I love the quote that this post is about even more today then I did a year ago. Check it out! 

Favorite Search Term

• breakup messages to encourage you
• how to help a friend through a breakup
• funny pics of waking up
• guinea pigs cooking (how many people search this? I'm getting multiple hits a week on this search term. funny. )
• catastrophizing

Now it's your turn!

What's one of your favorite joys from the week (it can be big or small)? 

Friday Favorites

Favorite Tiny Delight of the Week

Valentine's day treats! I still have a few little chocolates and candy hearts left, and I've been slowly enjoying them throughout the last two weeks. I've always enjoyed the conversation hearts, although I would certainly appreciate it if their were some humorous ones as well. Or some specific profession-related hearts. That'd be a good time. Either way, you all know I love all things holidays, and I've been soaking up all the pink and hearts I can get the last few weeks. 

Favorite Quote of the Week

"To be alive, to be able to see, to walk... it's all a miracle." -Arthur Rubinstein

Favorite Post By Someone Else

Do One Thing - A great post on just doing one little thing- taking one step forward. It's easy to feel stuck and frustrated, and this post sheds some great light on the next step to take.

Favorite Past Post

This week I'm whipping out a post from almost exactly a year ago: Plantains! I've been a huge fan on plantains for a number of years, but this was the first time I'd actually cooked them. If you haven't ever cooked them, check this post out and give it a shot. They are delicious and really easy to cook!

Favorite Search Term

• the decision you make today make the person you'll be tomorrow
• chemical causes of seasonal affective disorder
• identifying cognitive distortions
• barrier to ocd treatment
• cooked guinea pig (i really hope someone wasn't looking for a recipe with that search)

Now it's your turn!

What're some of your favorites from the week? Have you ever cooked plantains or tried guinea pig? What's your favorite Valentine's Day treat? 

Thankfulness Project Monday

"Gratefulness is the key to a happy life that we hold in our hands, because if we are not grateful, then no matter how much we have we will not be happy- because we will always want to have something else or something more." - Brother David Steindl-Rast

An interesting quote to get you all thinking this morning. So here are some of the things I'm feeling grateful for on this Monday morning.

• The Oscars! I've been a fan of Oscar Sunday for many many years. I love the anticipation when I wake up that morning, as I begin to prep food for the little get together I host every year, when people are walking the red carpet, and during the actual show itself. It's a little thing to look forward to, but adds a bit of excitement and joy to my life. It's the little things, right?
• My work schedule: I'm a fan of my work schedule right now. Not only do I have a full load of clients, but I have some free time to work on other things, such as researching and writing. I've found a great balance at work, and I like it!
• Chips and salsa. Delicious. Absolutely delicious. I love sweet things in life, but I REALLY love salty things, and this does the trick. I eat a little bit of chips and salsa at least half of the days of the week. 
• Pictures from vacations: Sometimes when it's cold, gray, or I'm having a bad day, it really lifts my spirits to go through some pictures from some of my favorite vacations, and remember the good memories from that time. 
• Old episodes of The Office. I have most of the seasons on DVDs, and sometimes I really enjoy whipping them out and watching a few episodes. I always laugh, and they bring a smile to my face. Plus, I enjoy watching awkwardness happen, and Michael certainly is awkward!

Now it's your turn:

What are you thankful for today? Is there a TV show you like to watch when you need a good laugh? Did you watch The Oscars? What were your thoughts?

The Benefits Of The Winter Seasons In Our Lives

If we had no winter, the spring would not be so pleasant: if we did
not sometimes taste of adversity, prosperity would not be so welcome.
- Charlotte Bronte

Winter can be a struggle, can't it? Although this year has been a little different then many years (warmer temperature, more sun, etc...), winter can still be a bit of a drag. For those who experience some degree of seasonal affective disorder, it can be even more difficult. For more information on that, check out the following posts:
Surviving The Winter Blues

What Is Seasonal Affective Disorder?
Causes of Seasonal Affective Disorder
Symptoms of Seasonal Affective Disorder

Treatments For Seasonal Affective Disorder

Last year I wrote a post entitled Is There Hope In Winter? I'd like to discuss again a point I brought up in that post. While many of us don't love winter, it provides an interesting reminder and lesson for our lives. While winter is a long, dark, tiresome, or sad period of our lives, we go through it confident that spring will come once again. With it, spring will bring sunshine, new life, flowers, birds chirping, and a heightened mood. The seasons mirror an important lesson for our lives. The winter allows us to learn how to survive unpleasant situations while having hope that spring will come, and with it will come joy once again. When we hit times of adversity, like winter, we feel distress, notice our mood decreases, and feel like the light in our lives decreases. Adversity doesn't last forever, just like winter. Following times of adversity and grief comes the signs of spring, slowly and surely creeping into our lives again. 

There is hope. Whether it's the weather, a tough situation, adversity, pain, or grief- spring will come. Joy will return. 

Now it's your turn!

How do you allow the hope of spring to get you through winter or times of adversity in life? What's your favorite season?

Friday Favorites

Favorite Tiny Delight of the Week

Cleaning! Most of us do some amount of cleaning each week (I hope!), but sometimes it's good to do a more then average type of cleaning... you know, the type of cleaning that goes above and beyond what you usually do. The type of cleaning that involves throwing things out. The type of cleaning that involves organizing (or maybe re-organizing) things. I know, it's not quite spring yet, but who says that a little bit of spring cleaning can't come early this year? I love my house feeling a bit lighter and more put together. I guess the extra sun this weather has helped my levels of motivation? 

Favorite Quote of the Week

"The way to gain a good reputation is to endeavor to be what you desire to be." -Socrates

Favorite Post By Someone Else

Changes in the Brain Resulting From Anorexia - This is a great post that succinctly summarizes how the brain changes, or at least some common denominators in the brain, when an individual has struggled with anorexia. It's a quick read and will help increase your understanding! Check it out! 

Favorite Past Post

Loving Myself, Loving Others- I wrote this post right about this time last year as a sort of response to some thoughts on Valentine's Day. Please check this post out and figure out some next steps towards loving yourself better! 

Favorite Search Term

• guinea pig cooking
• cognitive distortions catastrophizing 
• distortion of identity
• don't play the victim
• let's break stress

Now it's your turn!

What's one of your favorites from the week? Do you do one big "spring cleaning" each year or do you break it into sections? 

Thankfulness Project Monday

"It is greatfulness which makes the soul great." -Abraham Joshua Heschel

There was something about this quote that really stood out to me, and I've been saving it for a couple weeks for a thankfulness posts. So, here you go:) The more I practice regular thankfulness and gratitude, the more I believe this is an important component of being a healthy individual. I continue to challenge each of you to add this to your daily or weekly habits!

That being said, here are a few things I'm feeling thankful for today:

• Time with someone I dearly love: This past week I got to spend time with someone that I deeply care about and don't get to see very often. Time with people like this is so precious to me, and I try to live moment to moment in the days I have. 
• Exercise: Throughout my day I look forward to pounding everything out on the treadmill, elliptical, or bike. It's time to process my day before I get home, and I'm almost always in a better mood when I'm done. I'm thankful I have access to equipment to work out in the winter months. 
• Twitter Chats: There's numerous twitter chats for just about any subject you can think of on twitter. It's a great way to connect with people who have similar interests, and gain some knowledge or be challenged in different ways. Take some time to figure out if there are any twitter chats that might be fun for you to participate in throughout the week!
• Almond Milk: Lactose free and full of calcium, this is quickly becoming one of my favorite drinks. I'm not a fan of drinking milk, but I actually look forward to a cup of this milk. Have you ever tried it?
• Salsa: LOVE. If it's mango or peach, I'm gonna love it even more. I crave this almost every time I work out, and absolutely love eating it. Salsa is a constant exercise in self control for me!

Now it's your turn: 

What are you feeling thankful for today? Have you ever tried almond milk? What twitter chats do you participate in throughout the week?

Friday Favorites

Favorite Tiny Delight of the Week

This awesome weather. I think I could simply leave it at that, because this weather has been really amazing. Coming off a few weeks of talking about Seasonal Affective Disorder, it's funny that the weather across the country has been unusually warm. The sun shining every day has been a welcome change to the gloomy and gray weather that is typical of January and February. 

Favorite Quote of the Week

"Character may be manifested in the great moments, but it is made in the small ones." -Phillips Brooks

Favorite Past Post

When Tomorrow Comes - a post about how we use our day. I love the quote that is included in this post!

Favorite Search Term

• jokes about pinterest
• cauliflower sweet potato
• types of wellness
• black and white thoughts
• boundary wheel in counseling

This post is short and sweet today. I'm out enjoying the nice weather:)

Now it's your turn!

Has the weather been unusually nice for you this week? What events in your life have developed character?

Thankfulness Project Monday

"He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has." -Epictetus

Happy Monday! This has been a really enjoyable week, and there's quite a few things that I'm feeling thankful for today. Today for my Thankfulness Project post, I'm choosing to rejoice in the things that I have been given in life:

• I'm thankful for puppies: They are cute, fun to play with, and incredibly cuddly. And it's hard to not smile and laugh when I'm around them! And pets are generally healthy to have around too, so that's a big plus!
• I'm thankful for running: I can pound out some stress, have some time apart to clear my head and process the day, think about what I want to do with my clients, and get some endorphins! Plus I know I'm doing something to benefit my body for the future. 
• I'm thankful for friends around me: There's very little I feel like I need to say about this. I'm thankful for the love, support, and laughter I get from the people in my life. 
• I'm thankful for fresh baked bread: Give me some olive oil with pepper and/or garlic to dip it into, and I'm a very happy camper. Not only is it delicious, but it is a comfort food as well! Yummm. 
• I'm thankful for hot showers: I try to be responsible and take as short of showers as I can. However, in the winter there's little that feels better then hot water and a steamy bathroom around you. Have you ever wondered why showers seem to be such a great place to think?
• I'm thankful for foods covered in chocolate: Raisons, fruit, nuts- it's all delicious, and when it's dark chocolate, there are health benefits too:) 
• I'm thankful for quotes that allow us to refocus

Now it's your turn!

What are you feeling thankful for today? Where's your favorite place to think and process the day? 

Friday Favorites

Favorite Tiny Delight of the Week

Stretching! Do you regularly stretch? Flexibility has been shown to provide multiple health benefits, both short term and long term. A regular stretching practice can be an incredibly important part of your week! For me, not only is it a healthy behavior that I engage in, but while I stretch I choose to focus on my breath. I slow my thoughts and my breathing, and focus in on the present. This becomes a very stress reliving activity for me, but mentally and physically. 

Favorite Quote of the Week

"Courage to start and willingness to keep everlasting at it are the requisites for success." - Alonzo Newton Benn

It's easy to quit and define ourselves as a "failure" when things don't work out after one or two times of trying. This quote landed in my inbox earlier this week, and I thought I'd share today!

Favorite Post By Someone Else

Things Blogging Has Taught Me by the Lean Green Bean. I actually just started reading her blog this past week, and this is one of the first blogs that I read from her! I loved it and thought I'd pass it along to each of you. I hope you enjoy:)

Favorite Past Post

Success or Failure? - Most of us feel like a failure at some point in our lives. This post addresses the feelings of failure that we have, and suggests some steps for wrestling through our definitions of failure in life. 

Favorite Search Term

• how does perfectionism develop
• playing the victim
• sense of control in life
• don't try to live someone else's life
• a loved one has ocd

Now it's your turn:

What are some of your favorites for the week? Do you easily define yourself or your behaviors as a "failure"? Do you regularly stretch? 

Friday Favorites

Favorite Tiny Delight of the Week

Blogs! Is that even ok for me to have that be a tiny delight? I vote yes, so we're going to move forward with that. I've been loving some good blogs this week! Whether they're blogs by other counselors, those struggling with a mental illness, or those who are writing healthy living blogs, I learn so much and my thinking is challenged in different areas! Thank you so much to each of you who take the time out of your day to write what you know, what you're learning, and what you're struggling through! I always look forward to opening my google reader for the evening!

Favorite Quote of the Week

"What ought one to say then as each hardship comes? I was practicing for this, I was training for this." -Epictetus

Inspiring, isn't it?

Favorite Post By Someone Else

On Behalf Of All the !0+ Minute Mile Runners - This post by the Wannabe Athlete is a great post discussing running at slower paces. I know a lot of people don't feel like a "real runner" if they aren't running 8 minute splits, and it can get discouraging! This post is for you!! 

Favorite Past Post

Life Is A Daring Adventure - This post is based around a quote that I mull over quite a bit in life. Any thoughts from you all? 

Favorite Search Term

• Is Perfectionism black and white
• challenge irrational beliefs
• identity distortions
• songs for counselors day
• banana bread greek yogurt

Now it's your turn!

What are some of your favorites for the week? How can you practice for hardship?

Friday Favorites

Favorite Tiny Delight of the Week

Hummus! I can't remember if I've ever chosen a food as a tiny delight of the week or not, but it's certainly not something I do often. This is a great "tie me over" snack when i get home from work. I keep some cut up veggies in my refrigerator, and it's an easy snack when I have the munchies! 

Favorite Quote of the Week

"Shall we make a new rule of life from tonight? Always try to be a little kinder than necessary." -J.M. Barrie

Favorite Post By Someone Else

What Do School Counselors Do Anyways? - Ali at Food. Fitness. Fashion shares what responsibilities make up her job as a school counselor. This post is easy to read and will give you a good idea about one aspect of the field of counseling! 

Favorite Past Post

Hello, I'm--- and I'm a Perfectionist - This post is from about 10 months ago, but in the last week has gotten more views then it did when I originally posted it. I'm not sure why though! So, I decided to just post it here and let you all take a look. Enjoy!

Favorite Search Term

• how to track and modify behavior
• voice inside your head can't do this liar
• healthy relationship wheel god
• pinterest counselor
• cognitive therapy attributes

Now it's your turn:

What're some of your "favorite things" from the week? 

Motivation for Change

If you don't know where you are going, you will probably end up somewhere else.  ~Lawrence J. Peter

Motivation is when your dreams put on work clothes.  ~Author Unknown

Over the past few weeks I've addressed a number of aspects of behavior change that people tend to skip over on their way to attempting to change something in their life. Here are the previous posts in this series:

• Track Your Behavior Before You Change It
• A Few Considerations Before Changing Behavior
• Establishing Mini-Steps to Attain Your Dreams

Before you start to change behavior, it's good to know why you'd like to change your behavior. The fact of the matter is that behavior change can be a difficult, long, hard, tedious process. There needs to be something we hold on to that will continue to motivate us forward when we want to give up (and for most of us, that time will come at some point). As you think about your dreams and what you'd like to achieve through behavior change, I'm wondering if you know what is motivating yourself forward. This "what" and "why" will help keep you going when the voice inside tells you to give up, that it isn't worth the time, energy, or work involved. 

Once you figure out what that motivation will be, write it down somewhere and read it regularly. A bathroom mirror or refrigerator are both good places to put motivations, as we tend to look at those places many times a day. The more we repeat something, the more it becomes an automatic thought. Because thoughts lead to our feelings and our behaviors, we need to get our thoughts right before we move forward. 

Let's look at a few examples:

Goal: Get healthy by working out 3 days a week (2 days running, 1 day biking)

Motivation: I'm choosing to exercise and get healthy because I desire to __________. (fill in the blank could be anything like the following: be an active grandparent one day, live a long, healthy life, feel better and stronger about myself).

Goal:  Correct my distorted thoughts and change these to rational thinking patterns

Motivation: I'm choosing to do the hard work of learning to challenge and change my distorted thinking patters because I want to ______. (fill in the blank. i.e. decrease the depressed or anxious feelings I experience, be a good role model to my children, be happier each day). 

See what I mean? This step, combined with the steps listed above, will start to set you up in the best way possible for being successful at your behavior change. 

We each do what we do for a specific reason. It's helpful to find out what the reason is that we engage in our current behavior, and create a new motivation for our new behavior. 

Now it's your turn:

What are some of your "motivations" for the year?

Weekend Catch Up

fact.

Going into this weekend I had a long to do list, and I've managed to check quite a few things off my list. It's been sunny and in the upper 40s and low 50s, which is a perfect winter weekend in my opinion! It's great weather to get outside and move as a family or on your own! I took advantage of the nice weather to get out and go on a run. Exercise really does impact mood and increase energy. 

You may have missed these this past week:

• 2012! A Few Considerations Before Behavior Change
• Thankfulness Project Monday
• Establishing Mini-Steps to Attain Your Dreams
• Wellness Wednesday: {Stress Management Part 1- healthy coping}
• Friday Favorites
• Gingerbread Pancakes

Now it's your turn!
What was the highlight of your weekend? What do you think of the quote at the beginning of this post?